Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Le Petit Gâteau des Légions Noires-Traditional cupcakes inspired by untraditional black metal


In a perfect world everything would be as stark and void of color as these cupcakes. They are baneful in their absolute disdain for your tastelessness, and are true misanthropes as far as baked goods go.


cupcake

Make it:

Cake:
3 cups flour
2 cups sugar
1/2 cup cocoa powder
2 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. salt
2/3 cup oil
2 tsp. vanilla
2 tsp. apple cider vinegar
2 cups cold water

Cream cheese sea of woe:
8 oz. cream cheese(softened!!!!!)
1/3 cup sugar
1 large egg
chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350 degrees
In a large bowl sift together: flour, sugar, cocoa powder, baking soda, salt.
Add: Oil, vanilla, vinegar, cold water
Stir gently until just combined. Too much friction annihilates the bubbles!

In a small bowl stir together until creamy:
Softened cream cheese, sugar, and egg. Add as many chocolate chips as you can stand.

Fill cupcake tins about half full of cake batter, and drop cream cheese mixture by the spoonful into each one.
Bake 15-20 minutes, or until toothpick inserted into cakey part comes out clean.
Let cool, and decorate with a splattering of melted chocolate.

Best enjoyed when paired with obscure French black metal.

192 comments:

The Breadmaster said...

I love this blog. The only blog i find myself wanting more of. Plz. to be baking more dear. You have a wonderful talent.

oddbirdling said...

Sans the animal products, your cupcakes sound amazing. Please come over and teach a girl to bake in the black metal domestic way. Check my blog because I'll be organizing a scavenger hunt on bikes. Spread the word!

Dotstry said...

I am having the strangest urge to don black clothing, set fire to a church, and create these delectables in the smoldering ashes.

Ned Baker said...

Found your blog via Slumbering Lungfish... Love it

Natalie said...

This is amazing. Hail and kill!

tashikitten said...

Ditto on the Slumbering Lungfish source. The question is, how many chocolate chips can you stand?

z,n3lq said...

legions noire cupcakes.. i can die in peace

shannie cakes said...

these look delish... i wonder if they'll taste as good listening to swedish black metal?

Provoking Puppet said...

you are quite the artist, both in baking and writing.

Anonymous said...

Great looking cupcakes. I am going to have to try those chocolate cupcakes with cream cheese filling. Yum!

Mitty said...

You are fabulous. I am definitely making the Le Petit Gateau cupcakes this weekend!

xopher.tm said...

Another Lungfisher here.

You (and your blog) rock. Hope to see more soon. Something tasty to go with Sunn O))) perhaps?

Beta Mike said...

My mom has been making these "Black Bottom Cupcakes" for years and they are my absolute favorite!

Kate said...

Yum! Who knew eternal damnation could be so delicious?

mel said...

Metal and cupcakes make a great combination!

Marilla @ Cupcake Rehab said...

I love your blog, and I love your tags: "black murder, chocolate, cupcakes"... fantastic.

Megan said...

oh crap, I'm so glad everyone loves this!

Anonymous said...

Void of color? Tasteless? Chocolate, black truffles--all manner of foods enjoy colors far darker than pastel and all manner of foods look unruly and taste in ways that depart from someone's norms...My skin is the color of your black metal cupcakes...does that make me devoid of color? Now how's that for taking you seriously!

Anonymous said...

::looks up, shrugs::
What?

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@Dotstry: And mix the batter in the hollowed out skull of your late Bass Player!

Anonymous said...

Unless the spelling mistakes were intentional, it should be called "Le Petit Gâteau des Légions Noires". There's no need for a "du" in there.

Aesop said...

Discussion about your LLN cupcakes here:
http://www.earth-dog.com/lounge/viewtopic.php?p=175021#175021

I anxiously await the recipes for Satyricon Carne, and Mayham and cheese sandwiches on Vondur bread.

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Holy crap, Mayham and Cheese. Thats brilliant!

Anonymous said...

I love this recipe! Take the darkness (and, possibly, the black metal) up a notch by substituting an imperial stout for the water. I'd suggest Lake Louie's devilishly delightful Mr. Mephistopheles (http://beerdorks.com/reviews.php?rev_id=272). Yum.

Meghan said...

he he he - eat em all up for breakfast along with blk coffee in a metal cup

Anonymous said...

My Evil Friend made these cupcakes and I tried one. I could feel my eyes of wrath taking over. Thanks Black Cat!

Anonymous said...

From the blackest depths of my oven crawled the seething dark horrors of Le Petit Gateau des Legions Noires! It was a Black Sunday indeed!! The recipe made a lot more of them then I expected, so the whole Legion was thoroughly glutted on the beastly cakes. It was BRUTAL.

wflor421 said...

Everything looks so yummy. I will link to you on my site. http://waynesworldofstuff.blogspot.com/

s said...

My sister baked these cupcakes using your recipe, and they were AMAZING!!! The BEST cupcakes I've ever had, and I used to work at Sweet Things in SF which is pretty darn good. Couldn't believe how moist they were, and not just on the first day!

jen's evil twin said...

I made your cupcakes for my brother's birthday and they were delicious, thank you.

My cream cheese filling didn't sink into a cool cross shape, so I took red gel food coloring and drew crosses on the top. It seemed to work well.

Jem said...

I am grimly serious when I say I want to marry you. Unhealthy relationship with black metal? what else could I want in a woman...Oh. Cupcakes. Sold.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
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I have made this for every function possible. A friend showed me this and I fell in love. Your blog is absolutely amazing!

pizda said...

Oh crap, I'm so glad everyone loves this!

bwin said...

its a great post!thanks

Terry Winkle said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
cocoa and coconut said...

These look fantastic, look at the moist middle!

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